Clacton breaks record for most candidates in an election

Friday 17 July was the deadline for candidates to nominate themselves for the Clacton by-election. As it turns out, a lot of people made that deadline, with Politics UK listing the following:

🚨 IN FULL: The 34 Clacton by-election candidates – the highest number ever recorded in a UK Parliamentary election

➡️ Nigel Farage
🗑️ Count Binface
🟤 Laurence Fox
🔵 Kai Stephens
🟠 Adham Alkhatip
⚪ Joseph 77
⚪ Tony Cane
⚪ Woke Trump Carrzee
⚪ William Stuart James Clouston
⚪ Rees Cowne
⚪ Glenn Charles Cummings
⚪ Martin Davies
⚪ Andy Erlam
⚪ Attieh Fard
⚪ Tony Francis
⚪ Robin Green
⚪ Abi Hookway
⚪️ Nick The Incredible Flying Brick
⚪️ Howling Laud Hope
⚪️ Baron Von Thunderclap
⚪ Stephen Richard Ingram
⚪ Amy Morris
⚪ Derrick Norbert Morris
⚪ Michael Noel O’Keeffe
⚪ Martyn O’Brien
⚪ Nick Pelas
⚪ Ketankumar Pipaliya
⚪ Daniel Pocock
⚪ James Ransley
⚪ Gerry Smith
⚪ John Stevens
⚪ Pamela Walford
⚪ Marcus White
⚪ Marc Wilkinson

Clacton residents must consider Mr Fish Finger?!

The main contender in this race is Count Binface, but we shouldn’t forget that Nigel Farage is also running. Farage was the Clacton MP already, but he stepped down to initiate this farce. The suspicion is he did so to distract from his many ongoing scandals, but no one can prove that — not least of all because he seems to have drawn more attention to himself if anything.

Besides Binface, Farage’s opponents include ridiculous characters like ‘Nick The Incredible Flying Brick’, ‘Baron Von Thunderclap’, and ‘Laurence Fox‘.  There’s also this guy:

One of the candidates is "Mr Fish Finger" 🤦‍♂️ https://t.co/qg45QQXTUP pic.twitter.com/ebMObcC7Ow

— James Harvey (@JamesHarvey2503) July 17, 2026

None of the major political parties are running against Farage because they decided to let this farce speak for itself. We said it would have been in the Greens’ favour to run against Farage and to drive the news cycle for six weeks, but the party decided not accept all that national attention. This won’t do them any favours in the long run, but it has at least allowed us to laugh at Farage.

In the video above, Binface says:

Hi, Count Binface here, and I’m ready to go for the Clacton by-election. And my goodness me, there’s no less than 34 candidates for this electoral feast. Going to be epic. In fact, it’s going to be like Comic-Con up on that stage. But then, I didn’t let the genie out of the bottle. I haven’t called this election. Somebody else has.

Now, here’s a little factoid for you. This is my eighth election on planet Earth, and I understand there is a tradition for Clacton candidates – eighth time lucky. So, how about it?

Here’s to a positive campaign showing the very best of democracy. May the best life form win, and make your vote count.

Binface has also made five pledges — four of which are highlighting Farage’s faults as an MP.

My Binface pledge card for Clacton – exploiting his opponent’s main local weaknesses pic.twitter.com/3RmonGwihj

— ALASTAIR CAMPBELL (@campbellclaret) July 16, 2026

Full steam ahead

Given his many ongoing controversies, there was some speculation that Nigel Farage would pull out before the deadline. Given how embarrassing this all is, him running could suggest he was indeed secretly paid £5 million to return as an MP in 2024, as people are now speculating. We can’t confirm that, of course, but we can say we wouldn’t subject ourselves to all this for free.

Read more about the candidates and by-election here.

Featured image via the Canary