Tom Watson warns of Trotskyists pushing hard-left ideology outside schools

Support us and go ad-free

Speaking in The Guardian, Tom Watson has been warning us all about THE EVER-PRESENT THREAT OF TROTSKYITES!

This is what Tom had to say:

We had a problem with Trots in the 1980s, but we managed to scare them out of the party by creating a fire-wall around us – a fire-wall which we set going by burning all our bridges with the mining unions.

The thing about your average Trot is that they can lay dormant for years at a time – much like the common flea. They awaken from these periods of hibernation when they sense the pulsing swell of a new social movement, and then they crawl out from under the floorboards where they’ve been hiding to find fresh victims.

Once out, they target politically naïve youngsters, and then they hypnotise them with their boring rhetoric so that they can regurgitate dangerous ideology into their semi-comatose ears.

I’ve also heard reports of Trots hanging around outside the schools – attempting to push their hard-left ideology on kids. Apparently they’re going about it exactly like how we said drug dealers conducted themselves in the 80s and 90s, only this time we’re not just making it up.

Honestly we’re not.

Read on...

Support us and go ad-free

To reinforce how dangerous this dated rhetoric is, the Labour Party has created the following posters to bludgeon their point home.

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING IMAGES CONTAIN ADVANCED PHOTOSHOPPING!

Tom Watson hard left pushers-01-min
And careers. Especially when you’ve based your career on fairness prevention.

 

Tom Watson hard left pushers-05-min
You need to learn to stop worrying and love da bomb. By which I mean Tony Blair. Tony Blair who won three elections. Making him da electoral bomb. And also *COUGHS* illegally war-killed all those people to death *COUGHS COUGHS*

 

Tom Watson hard left pushers-04-min
If your brain was on capitalism, you’d have three sausages and a great big hunk of bacon in there. I mean – you personally wouldn’t – but somebody definitely would. Although again – you technically, possibly could, and despite the fact that you almost certainly wouldn’t, things are at least set up so that you can pretend that maybe one day you might.

 

Tom Watson hard left pushers-03-min
As deadly as they are spineless. Sh*t – does that even make sense? DOES ANY OF THIS SH*T WE’RE COMING OUT WITH EVEN MAKE SENSE!?!?

 

Tom Watson hard left pushers-02-min
WON’T SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN!? I mean – not about their futures or anything. Just think about them in a purely esoteric sense, and assume that our shrieking indicates danger – danger you need to extract your children from at all costs. And don’t think about foreign children either, because… we don’t always treat them so good. Probably shouldn’t have explicitly stated that, as now you are clearly thinking about them. Why are we even narrating these posters? I knew this was a bad idea, but then again all of our recent ideas have been terrible, and yet you still have to do something if you want to carry on getting paid.

 

Tom Watson hard left pushers-06-min
Obviously our verbal and written propaganda isn’t doing the trick, so here’s a picture of some scary eyeballs, and now hopefully you all get the point? Hello? Did it work? … … … Why do we even bother? WE SLAVE OUR ARSES OFF ALL DAY WRITING TOP QUALITY SPIN TO PUT ON THE TABLE FOR YOU UNGRATEFUL PEOPLE, AND YOU JUST TURN YOUR NOSES UP AT IT AND GO WITH CORBYN AND HIS GODDAMN TRUTH! TELLING THE TRUTH IS EASY! DO YOU NOT GET THAT!? ANYONE CAN DO IT! I MEAN – NOT US AS WE’RE ALL PRETTY CROOKED, BUT… … …err… … … oh no.

 

Remember kids – WHINGERS DON’T TAKE DRUGS!

I mean socialism.

Whingers don’t take socialism.

Or is it winners don’t take socialism?

Although seeing as how Jeremy is about to win his second leadership contest, who can really say?

Featured image via Wikimedia / Pixabay

Included images via Wikimedia / Wikimedia / Wikimedia / Wikimedia / Wikimedia

Support us and go ad-free

We need your help to keep speaking the truth

Every story that you have come to us with; each injustice you have asked us to investigate; every campaign we have fought; each of your unheard voices we amplified; we do this for you. We are making a difference on your behalf.

Our fight is your fight. You’ve supported our collective struggle every time you gave us a like; and every time you shared our work across social media. Now we need you to support us with a monthly donation.

We have published nearly 2,000 articles and over 50 films in 2021. And we want to do this and more in 2022 but we don’t have enough money to go on at this pace. So, if you value our work and want us to continue then please join us and be part of The Canary family.

In return, you get:

* Advert free reading experience
* Quarterly group video call with the Editor-in-Chief
* Behind the scenes monthly e-newsletter
* 20% discount in our shop

Almost all of our spending goes to the people who make The Canary’s content. So your contribution directly supports our writers and enables us to continue to do what we do: speaking truth, powered by you. We have weathered many attempts to shut us down and silence our vital opposition to an increasingly fascist government and right-wing mainstream media.

With your help we can continue:

* Holding political and state power to account
* Advocating for the people the system marginalises
* Being a media outlet that upholds the highest standards
* Campaigning on the issues others won’t
* Putting your lives central to everything we do

We are a drop of truth in an ocean of deceit. But we can’t do this without your support. So please, can you help us continue the fight?

The Canary Support us

Comments are closed