‘Subhuman leftist saboteurs have lowered the tone!’ claims The Daily Mail

Subhuman leftist saboteurs have lowered the tone claims the daily mail OTP
Wilson Belshaw

Obviously, most people don’t like the abuse that happens in the UK. Whether it stems from Twitter or the tabloids. Whether it stems from the public or from politicians. And whether it comes from people you otherwise agree with or people you ardently oppose.

And yet that abuse is there. Coming in from all sides. Invading public discourse like black mould seeping into a poorly maintained bedsit.

A source speaking out on behalf of the abused, though, is actually one of the UK’s most prominent serial abusers. Said abuser, of course, being The Daily Mail. An abuser that I will now lightly abuse myself. Albeit in a classy way. Using things like satire and irony – as opposed to the more straightforward language that’s used in the Mail Online’s comment section:

A comment section that the hatred-hating writers at The Mail have presumably never actually read. Because obviously, they’d be mortified to discover the shocking scale of abuse that lurks beneath every one of their articles:

Damn, dirty apes!

The latest Mail editorial* on the issue reads:

The abuse in this country has reached intolerable levels! And all because we have allowed our country to become infested with bestial guttersnipes who have more in common with the average rat than you or I!

These foul, malodorous pukebags infest every last area of this country! And they are legion. Making up 48% of the country if the Brexit referendum is anything to go by!

Most of them are feckless, drug-addled, pansy extremists! The rest tend to be nurses, firefighters, or teachers! Which seems like a perfectly nice thing to be – BUT THEY ARE JUST VIRTUE SIGNALLING! They only entered those professions so that you would think they are nice! Which explains why they’re so OBSESSED WITH MONEY! Always asking to be paid a FAIR AMOUNT!

It’s important to remember that these saboteurs, who want to give our country away to transgender terrorists, AREN’T EVEN HUMAN! Because it’s only through dehumanising them that we can CRUSH THEM! And crush them WE MUST! BECAUSE WE HATES THEM! WE HATES THEM! WE HATES THEM!

The diatribe continued in that fashion for several more pages. Eventually reaching a point at which it wasn’t even words anymore – just graphic drawings of terrible atrocities with love hearts surrounding them.

A diatribe which was actually the most balanced thing they’ve written in ages.

 

*probably…

Get Involved!

– For more satirical news, you can also follow Off The Perch on Facebook and Twitter.

Featured image via Pexels

We need your help ...

The coronavirus pandemic is changing our world, fast. And we will do all we can to keep bringing you news and analysis throughout. But we are worried about maintaining enough income to pay our staff and minimal overheads.

Now, more than ever, we need a vibrant, independent media that holds the government to account and calls it out when it puts vested economic interests above human lives. We need a media that shows solidarity with the people most affected by the crisis – and one that can help to build a world based on collaboration and compassion.

We have been fighting against an establishment that is trying to shut us down. And like most independent media, we don’t have the deep pockets of investors to call on to bail us out.

Can you help by chipping in a few pounds each month?

The Canary Support us

Comments are closed

Wilson Belshaw