For several decades, scientists have warned that climate change could tear a hole in the Earth-Oz continuum. This would see magical weather tornadoes regularly tearing people into the wonderful world of Oz. An event that traditionally only happened every 30 years or so (i.e. the amount of time it took for Hollywood to run out of new ideas).
Sceptics, however, poo-pooed these claims – saying:
No, no, no! Everything is fine! And I don’t have to listen if I stick my fingers in my ears and go LA-LA-LA!
An argument that they’re sticking to – even though recent weather phenomena mean many of them aren’t in Kansas anymore.
Scarecrow needs a brain
We spoke to the leading moron climate sceptic, Francis Flipknuckle, about the situation:
Well obviously, having our house blown straight out of reality is a bit of an inconvenience, but I don’t really see the link between this and the thing that has long been predicted to cause this.
These things just happen. I mean – obviously, they never used to happen. But just because the climate is changing doesn’t mean that climate change is real.
Read on...Support us and go ad-free
If anything, this is probably caused by that law Obama passed that means all soldiers have to switch genders and marry one another. My house never got blown to Oz before that!
Our interview was cut short at this point, as Mr Flipknuckle was abducted by a troop of flying monkeys. “This is fine!” he shouted, as they carried him away. “This is normal!”
Of course, it could just be one big coincidence that once-in-a-lifetime weather events are happening twice-in-a-daytime.
And obviously, the only rational thing to do is to wait and see.
Because if it is coincidental, then everything will be fine. And if it isn’t, then everything will be…
…I think I need to reassess the risk management on this.
Featured image via Flickr
Do your bit for independent journalism
Did you know that less than 1.5% of our readers contribute financially to The Canary? Imagine what we could do if just a few more people joined our movement to achieve a shared vision of a free and fair society where we nurture people and planet.
We need you to help out, if you can.
When you give a monthly amount to fund our work, you are supporting truly independent journalism. We hold power to account and have weathered many attempts to shut us down and silence the counterpoint to the mainstream.
You can count on us for rigorous journalism and fearless opposition to an increasingly fascist government and right wing mainstream media.
In return you get:
- Advert free reading experience
- Behind the scenes monthly e-newsletter
- 20% discount from our shop