• Donate
  • Login
Sunday, June 7, 2026
  • Login
  • Register
Canary
Cart / £0.00

No products in the basket.

MEDIA THAT DISRUPTS
  • UK
  • Global
  • Opinion
  • Skwawkbox
  • Manage Subscription
  • Support
  • Features
    • Health
    • Environment
    • Science
    • Feature
    • Sport & Gaming
    • Lifestyle
    • Tech
    • Business
    • Money
    • Travel
    • Property
    • Food
    • Media
  • SHOP
No Result
View All Result
MANAGE SUBSCRIPTION
SUPPORT
  • UK
  • Global
  • Opinion
  • Skwawkbox
  • Manage Subscription
  • Support
  • Features
    • Health
    • Environment
    • Science
    • Feature
    • Sport & Gaming
    • Lifestyle
    • Tech
    • Business
    • Money
    • Travel
    • Property
    • Food
    • Media
  • SHOP
No Result
View All Result
Canary
No Result
View All Result
  • Editorial
  • Explainer
  • Global
  • Opinion
  • Environment
  • Feature
  • Food
  • Health
  • Science
  • Skwawkbox
  • UK

‘Go dumber!’ Tory members urge MPs voting on a new leader

John Shafthauer by John Shafthauer
18 May 2019
in UK
Reading Time: 2 mins read
167 6
A A
1
Home UK
Share on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on BlueskyShare via WhatsAppShare via TelegramShare on Threads

Following two years of dreadfulness, Theresa May will soon be gone. She might be the worst prime minister ever. But who will replace her? If the Tory membership has its way, we’re going to double down on the dreadfulness and elect Boris fucking Johnson:

Boris Johnson is likely to be Prime Minister in months, if not weeks. Let that sink in. https://t.co/6eFZoG2EEo

— Owen Jones (@owenjonesjourno) May 17, 2019

Dumber and dumberer

The public opinion of Boris Johnson is he’s a bumbling buffoon. The media’s take is he’s actually a political mastermind. The reality is, he’s an idiot who thinks he’s a genius pretending to be an idiot.

So how has he prospered?

Well it’s a mystery, isn’t it – that despite his wealthy upbringing, and despite graduating from Oxford University – he’s gone on to be massively successful in politics – despite constant, constant fuck ups.

Some media types explain this by saying:

Although it seems like he’s blundering from one catastrophe to another, he’s actually constantly raising his profile. It’s very clever, really.

A guy we met on the street suggested:

He’s immune to failure because he’s an establishment wanker. If he worked at Tesco, he’d be out on his arse. Because he works in politics, the powers that be have rewarded him with a string of increasingly lucrative newspaper columns.

Surely something

Presumably, he has done something to warrant becoming PM, though, right? I mean – we can’t just elect an absolute fucking dolt because he really wants us to, can we?

Oh no – wait – we have done that before, actually – with like 95% of our prime ministers.

Featured image via Kuhlmann MSC – Wikimedia / World Economic Forum – Wikimedia

Share128Tweet80ShareSendShareShare
Previous Post

A survey about the DWP needs to hear from you

Next Post

They’re trying to blame Labour. But it’s clear as day why the Brexit talks have collapsed.

Next Post
Jeremy Corbyn and Theresa May at PMQs

They’re trying to blame Labour. But it’s clear as day why the Brexit talks have collapsed.

Vysionaer

A new artist with a 'vision' has just dropped his debut EP

The US and UK have a new rival when it comes to the 'most prolific user of killer drones'

Images from the week's satirical stories

The week in satire Vol. #119

Topple Uncaged S2 EP4

CanaryPod: Topple Uncaged S2 EP4

Comments 1

  1. royjenkins284 says:
    7 years ago

    ‘Go dumber!’ Tory members urge MPs voting,
    on a new leader.
    ///
    LOOK TORY PARTY MEMBERS!
    The true “FACT” is now your Tory party in power
    Is coming to an end FULL STOP!
    WHY YOU ALL ASK?????
    Well for betraying us Millions of leave voter for one thing over a Full leaving of E.U. No strings attached,
    Your party Prime Minister promised us voters in 2016 failing as we are (still in E.U.) fully now.
    ///
    IN addition, your Tory Govt SCAM U-CREDIT mess you invented for benefit claimant that has been proven to kill people OFF plus is making a mass poverty mess of in low paid in working family’s now. This SCAM benefit should be SCRAPED FULL STOP.
    ////
    Remembering Tory party members including your voters this SCAM U-CREDIT is of your party making ONLY and of your party implementing as well,
    Without any impact assessment done before any of it was put into practises by your incompetent party Minister Plus M.P. the 2 problem here alone will cost your Tory party power at next G.E. or any local election held we free voter will see to removing you from power NO matter who is in charge of Tory party be it Ms May or Boris Tory power is coming to an end FULL STOP! just so you understand my post as a free voter
    With No ties to any party in power or out of power.
    ///
    My record of changing gout come of G.E. plus local area election is proven Tor party not make beleave O.K.
    1- in 2015 we help remove Labour for power DONE!
    2- in 2016 E.U. vote + removing of David Cameron as Prime Minister DONE!
    3- in 2017 G.E. help get a Hung Tory Govt DONE!
    4- in May 2018 + 2019 help remove local area Tory Cllr up and down the country DONE!
    So, we FREE voter do know what we are doing Tory Govt so your rain as party in power is numbered now no matter who in charge of your party Ms. May, Boris
    To get back in our FREE voter’s good books Tory party you will have to SCRAP FULLY the Tory SCAM U-CREDIT before any new G.E. is held.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Great march for gaza
Skwawkbox

Sectarians fling racist abuse at N Ireland’s charity Great March for Gaza

by Skwawkbox
6 June 2026
World Cup
Global

World Cup — Water bottle ban sparks controversy

by Alaa Shamali
6 June 2026
israel prison
Analysis

Even eyesight is restricted for Palestinian prisoners in Israel’s tortorous prisons

by Ben Marmarelli
6 June 2026
Orientalism
Explainer

Orientalism — What Edward Said can teach us about the US-Israeli war against Iran

by Tchanguize Mahmoodzadeh
6 June 2026
Palestine
Global

Palestine — Ministry of Health in financial crisis because of ‘Israel’

by Charlie Jaay
6 June 2026

The Canary
PO Box 71199
LONDON
SE20 9EX

Canary Media Ltd – registered in England. Company registration number 09788095.

For guest posting, contact [email protected]

For other enquiries, contact: [email protected]

Complaints and Corrections

About the Canary

Meet the Team

© Canary Media Ltd 2026, all rights reserved | Website by Monster | Hosted by Krystal | Privacy Settings

Ok

Create New Account!

Fill the forms below to register

All fields are required. Log In

Retrieve your password

Please enter your username or email address to reset your password.

Log In
  • UK
  • Global
  • Opinion
  • Skwawkbox
  • Manage Subscription
  • Support
  • Features
    • Health
    • Environment
    • Science
    • Feature
    • Sport & Gaming
    • Lifestyle
    • Tech
    • Business
    • Money
    • Travel
    • Property
    • Food
    • Media
  • SHOP
  • Login
  • Sign Up
  • Cart