Trump may literally be killing himself

According to a new interview, Donald Trump has increased his aspirin dose to ensure he has “nice, thin blood”. The problem is that Trump made this decision himself. The bigger problem is that it’s something doctors recommend against for a man of his advanced age.

As Signs of Aging Emerge, Trump Responds With Defiance, Including Taking More Aspirin Than His Doctors Recommend — WSJ pic.twitter.com/mZ66Fgzoea

— NewsWire (@NewsWire_US) January 1, 2026

Once again, Trump has decided he knows better than medical professionals:

What are these people doing anywhere near public office?

Trump indicates he is open to RFK Jr’s proposal to ban vaccines if elected https://t.co/C2jJKD4KQ0

— Samuel West 💙💛 (@exitthelemming) November 4, 2024

Who needs woke doctors?

The latest revelations come from a piece in the Wall Street Journal which reports:

Trump gets little sleep and has recently struggled to keep his eyes open during several televised events in the West Wing. Aides, donors and friends say they often have to speak loudly in meetings with the president because he strains to hear. Aside from golf, Trump doesn’t get regular exercise, and he is known to consume a diet heavy on salty and fatty foods, such as hamburgers and french fries.

The large dose of aspirin he chooses to take daily has caused him to bruise easily, he said, and he has been encouraged by his doctors to take a lower dose. But Trump has declined to switch because he has been taking it for 25 years. “I’m a little superstitious,” he said in the interview.

A ‘little superstition’ is not uncommon in the White House. President Ronald Reagan, for instance, ran many decisions through his wife’s psychic.

We don’t know if it was the spirit world which advised he deregulate everything and push toxic individualism, but that political ethos is what led us to a world in which everything is decaying while a handful of individuals have more power than god.

Thankfully, there is now pushback against Reagan’s astrology-based politics, including from Trump’s favourite New York mayor:

He’s 100% correct in this. Rugged individualism is responsible for most of the problems in people’s lives https://t.co/egLgAnaO0d

— evan loves worf (@esjesjesj) January 2, 2026

Back to the interview, it’s this section on Trump’s aspirin use which really got people’s blood pumping:

“They say aspirin is good for thinning out the blood, and I don’t want thick blood pouring through my heart,” Trump said. “I want nice, thin blood pouring through my heart. Does that make sense?”

So, does it make sense?

Well, that depends on what his aims are.

Blood is thicker than water

Unless you're Trump, apparently https://t.co/10jJ4Uzlh8

— Garth (@ThatGarthGuy) January 1, 2026

As the WSJ revealed, this is how much aspirin Trump takes:

Barbabella, Trump’s physician, said the president uses aspirin for “cardiac prevention.” He said Trump takes 325 milligrams of aspirin a day. A low dose of aspirin is most commonly 81 milligrams, according to the Mayo Clinic.

This is what the BBC reported in 2017:

People over 75 taking daily aspirin after a stroke or heart attack are at higher risk of major – and sometimes fatal – stomach bleeds than previously thought, research in the Lancet shows.

The ‘daily aspirin’ use detailed in that article was 75mg.

So yes, his aspirin use makes perfect sense, if what he’s hoping to achieve is a fatal stomach bleed.

Given Trump’s history of antagonising everyone besides his wealthy donors, people are responding to his DIY medical experimentation as follows:

Don’t let those woke doctors tell you what to do, sir, take as many pills as you want to. https://t.co/q8Q79HaDGT

— Scrumble Eggs 🇵🇸 (@scrumble_eggs) January 1, 2026

Health concerns? Surely not Trump?

Trump may be slowly drugging himself to death, but his health is good besides that, right?

Umm:

Trump said he hasn’t made changes to his diet. In a podcast interview in October, Republican National Committee Chairman Joe Gruters described being shocked by Trump’s eating habits when they traveled together during the campaign. While flying to a campaign event, according to Gruters, Trump consumed french fries, a McDonald’s Quarter Pounder hamburger, a Big Mac and a Filet-O-Fish.

Trump said he had plenty of energy, which he credited to his parents, who he said were energetic until their old age.

“Genetics are very important,” he said. “And I have very good genetics.”

That’s right, he’s got those ‘good genes’ which direct a person to chow down aspirin and Filet-O-Fish by the fistful.

While Trump is possibly not long for this world, the impact of his presidencies will unfortunately take longer to pass than his lunch.

Featured image via Intropin (Wikimedia)