EU elections ‘prove us right’, claims everyone

People arguing in front of a Union Jack
John Shafthauer

So Britain has had yet more elections. That’s good. Elections always go well for us. This one has proven especially good, as it’s proven people right on Brexit. Although which people got proven right depends on whom you speak to.

Splitting image

According to Brexiteers:

The Brexit Party is the biggest winner. Suck on that, metropolitan elite! This clearly proves people want Brexit. You know, if you ignore that they’re still way below a majority.

According to Remainers:

The overall vote share massively favours Remain! Or at least it does if you squint a bit, do the maths wrong, ignore the Tories, and pretend that Labour has a clear Remain position.

According to THE 63% OF PEOPLE WHO DIDN’T BOTHER VOTING:

We told you we’re all fucking sick of it – stop making us vote for shit – it only makes things worse!

When asked to extrapolate what the future holds going off these results, one analyst said:

Fuck knows.

Another elaborated:

Something terrible, undoubtedly. According to recent polling, the only majority that currently exists is for ‘never having to hear about Brexit again’.

Time crisis

The promised Brexit might be undeliverable, but people who voted for it seemingly won’t be happy until that’s definitively proven.

Clearly, at this point, the only thing anyone could do to fix this mess is travel back in time and milkshake baby David Cameron.

Featured image via pixabay / pixabay

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  • Show Comments
    1. One thing that is clear is that Jeremy Corbyn is at best irrelevant to the Brexit debate.
      14 per cen against the WORST prime minister in ever. Pathetic and the fall out from the elections looks set to fragment the Labour Party even further. And the childish reporting on this Corbyn mouthpiece of a website calls for celebration about Campbell’s expulsion.

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