Boris Johnson denies making his previous denial mid-denial

Boris Johnson had several things to say about Turkey during the European Referendum – many of which weren’t true. In a development that has shocked everyone, the man who lied about Turkey has now lied about lying about Turkey.

Gasp

Speaking on the matter, Johnson said:

Speak about Turkey? I’ve never even heard of Turkey. I wasn’t even aware that turkeys are a kind of monumental chicken until earlier.

When it was pointed out that he’d actually visited Turkey, he went on:

My assistant led me to believe we’d travelled to Blackpool. I did wonder why I couldn’t understand anyone, but you know what these Northerners are like.

The Northern interviewer asked for clarification on what Northerners are like, to which Johnson replied:

I couldn’t say, because I’ve never met one. I’m not even sure which bit of the country they’re from, or, indeed, what a compass is. I’m also just remembering that I don’t speak any English, and will have to vacate this verbose symposium post-haste.

At this point, Johnson slowly backed away from the podium then ran off.