President Trump hands his Brexit plan over to Boris Johnson

Donald Trump asking "Have you tried making Mexico pay for it?" Trump Brexit plan
Wilson Belshaw

Boris Johnson recently suggested President Trump take over Brexit for us. Although Theresa May wasn’t too happy about the idea:

Regardless of May’s concerns, Trump has now provided us with what he described as:

The best breakfast plan ever [sic]. Seriously.

Thanks

The hastily scribbled plan came written on the back of a cheeseburger wrapper. It advised:

  1. Tell those sneaky Eurotrash that if they don’t give in to your demands, you’ll separate from mainland Europe. Threaten to build a sea between England and France, and tell them Belgium is paying for it.
  2. Isn’t Harry Potter British? Can he cast a spell at that angry European woman who doesn’t like me? I think her name is Theresa May.
  3. Tell the EU they’re all big losers, and you don’t need them anyway, because your buddy America will look out for you. What you don’t know is that we’re gonna turn your country into a Trump-brand golf course – ha ha ha [THIS SECOND PART WAS SCRIBBLED OUT BUT STILL QUITE CLEARLY LEGIBLE].
  4. I’ll be honest – I’m not entirely sure what the EU is. That’s a good thing, though. Facts will slow you down!
  5. Don’t leave without getting the oil.
  6. Hmm, I need to ask Donald Trump Jr. why I started this list.
  7. I wonder what Stormy Daniels is up to these days? I had sex with her, you know. Bigly.
  8. I’ll have ketchup on all of that, thanks.
  9. Love Donald Trump (The President).

All proposals 

The UK’s Brexit team is said to be considering Trump’s suggestions. Although they are worried the plan is a bit too detailed for them.

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Featured image via Gage Skidmore – Flickr / Irinawave – Wikimedia

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Wilson Belshaw