Tommy Robinson being sent to prison was the best thing to happen to the far right since Nigel Farage shaved his moustache.
"I think that politics needs a bit of spicing up" pic.twitter.com/FwCn8roVPQ
— Farage's Moustache (@NigelMoustache) August 12, 2016
All that’s fucked now, as the courts have released him on bail.
Immediately after Robinson was sent down, a cottage industry emerged around the #FreeTommy movement. This saw far-right shitheads raking in money hand over fist – selling items like:
- #FreeTommy T-shirts.
- #FreeTommy badges.
- #FreeTommy dungarees.
- Henry Hoovers with Tommy’s face drawn on the front.
- ‘Tickle-me-Tommy’ dolls that said phrases like, “You can’t even risk a mistrial in this country anymore!” and “Send money to my crowdfunder!”
- #FreeTommy jackboots.
Tommy’s release leaves the sellers of this tat up shit creek. The upside is they do have paddles. The downside is no one wants to buy a paddle with a #FreeTommy logo on it.
Perhaps the most inconvenienced person of all is Katie Hopkins.
Hopkins was in the middle of recording a folk concept album called Tommy (But Not the One About Pinball). She’d even taught herself how to play the lute and sing in what one listener described as:
A hideous falsetto – a sound like an angry cat fellating a firework.
Still, though, there’s hope for them on the horizon. Tommy is out on a technicality, and he’s already admitted committing contempt. He could potentially even get a longer stretch when he’s re-sentenced.
As such, expect to see #FreeTommy turkeys in time for Christmas.
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