There are several things the UK could do to break the Brexit deadlock. Sadly, we can’t do any of them, because our PM is a massive spanner who’s jammed herself in the works:
It's amazing that President Trump exists, and yet May is still the most useless leader in the world right now https://t.co/IRIBWNBAwI
— John Shafthauer (@johnshafthauer) March 21, 2019
Unfortunately for May, the UK has a contingency plan for encouraging people it doesn’t like to leave. And she’s the person who invented it.
Go away, May
As home secretary, May commissioned a fleet of ‘racist vans’ to encourage illegal immigrants to leave the country. These ended up being part of a ‘hostile environment’ that made non-white people feel unwelcome in Britain. The fleet was rightfully put out of action, but now we have someone who genuinely deserves a hostile environment.
The plan is to have these vans hang around outside parliament displaying messages like:
- Just stop.
- But are you being ‘very clear’?
- If you’re worried people will remember you as the worst PM ever, it’s already too late to change that.
- Everything you just said is nothing.
- If you’d quit already, you’d be running through a field of wheat by now.
- This isn’t normal.
- You’re not normal.
- Unless you’re a super villain with a secret scheme to devalue Britain and sell it to North Korea, your plan isn’t working.
- Even James Cleverly is tired of kissing your arse.
- So long, and thanks for all the fash!
Some people have argued that harassing May with vans isn’t nice. And it isn’t. It’s a phenomenon we used to recognise as ‘protest’. And if you can’t protest the politicians who’ve harassed an entire nation of people, then who can you protest?’
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