Brits preparing themselves for another year of Brexit negotiations

A woman screaming
John Shafthauer

So it’s looking like Brexit will be extended – again – this time for up to a year. It’s taken us three years to negotiate fuck all, so obviously having time to arrange 30% more fuck all is vital. But how are Brits reacting to this lengthy Brextension?

Badly, it turns out. We cracked open a window here at Off The Perch, and can confirm that many UK citizens are responding as you’d expect – by screaming endlessly into the void.

Breactions

People have varying methods of coping with the never-ending Brexit. We spoke to a few of them. One person told us:

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I’ve got this metal bin that I put over my head. Whenever someone mentions Brexit, I twat it with a spanner until they shut up. I’ve developed terrible tinnitus as a result, which has been something of a relief if anything.

Another said:

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I’ve trained my cats to attack anyone who mentions the word ‘Brexit’. Unlike dogs, cats can get away with mauling people. Now attack, my pretties! Savage the bad man and his insufferable Brexit questions!

Many told us:

I’ve just stopped engaging with the news and politics altogether.

Bredicament

The longer Brexit goes on, the more damage it will do to people’s trust in politics. To be fair, though, there shouldn’t have been any trust in UK politics anyway. Possibly this whole mess will lead to a larger political awakening; possibly the complete opposite.

Either way, we should know sometime before the end of the century.

Featured image via MaxPixel

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John Shafthauer