Johnson and Trump finally seen in the same room together
For a long time, people have wondered if Boris Johnson and Donald Trump could actually be the same person. After all, they both:
- Would say anything to get their own way. Even when it completely contradicts the last thing they said.
- Have ridiculous blonde… well, I suppose you could call it hair?
- Publicly and shamelessly spout the sort of horrifyingly dated prejudices we thought belonged in the last century. Oh wait – no – I actually mean the second to last century, don’t I? Because the millennium happened and all that. And Jesus Christ, how is this still going on?
The conspiracy has been put to bed, anyway, as Johnson and Trump have now been pictured in the same room together. Although the thing about conspiracy theories is that you can’t ‘prove’ them out of existence. Because conspiracy theories aren’t based on truth – they’re based on gut feelings and people having too much time on their hands.
Theories
In place of the now discredited theory, several more have sprung into life:
- There was only one of them there, but the CIA deployed some clever trickery with mirrors. What, you don’t think the CIA has the power to do stuff with mirrors? LOL – wake up, sheeple.
- Trump is the version of Johnson from 20 years in the future who travelled back in time to stop Hillary Clinton inventing Terminators. That’s why he’s orange. Time-travel stains you orange. Everyone knows that – keep up!
- Facebook is cloning the Trump/Johnson character so that we can have one in every country. Like they do with Ronald McDonald. Only more ridiculous.
Twins
Of course, it’s most likely that they are in fact entirely separate idiots who seem to have somehow simultaneously gained power at the worst possible moment.
Because sometimes, reality is just worse than anything we can imagine.
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