Leveson Inquiry 2 not needed because the press is doing such an excellent job

Part two of the Leveson Inquiry was set to look into unlawful and improper conduct by the British media and police forces. However, as the press has been doing such a bang-up job since Leveson part one, said investigation is no longer required.

Huzzah for the red-tops!

After the phone hacking scandal, faith in the press was at an all-time low.

Worried that print media could be nearing its end, the press did everything it could to restore faith. Largely by pushing award-winning stories like the following:

• JEREMY CORBYN BEATS CHELSEA PENSIONER TO DEATH WITH COMMUNIST MANIFESTO.
• KINDNESS CAUSES CANCER.
• LILY ALLEN LINKED TO KILLER SEAGULL.
• SINGLE MOTHER OF THREE BULLIES SLUMLORD.
• LOLLIPOP LADY WHO ‘ISN’T THAT KEEN’ ON BREXIT SHOULD BE HANGED.
• EVERYONE YOUNGER THAN 55 ‘THICK AS SHIT’.
• FUCK SCOTLAND (The Daily Mail)
• SCOTLAND GOOD (The Scottish Daily Mail).
• THERESA MAY A COMPETENT LEADER.
• EVERYONE WHO DISAGREES WITH US IS A CRYBABY SNOWFLAKE WHO CAN’T TAKE BEING DISAGREED WITH.

Faith restored

When you get right down to it, the real crime would be forcing the press to undergo scrutiny right now.

It’s busy, after all, exposing Czechoslovakian spies and going morally and financially bankrupt.

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Featured image via Wikimedia – David Shankbone (image was altered)