Johnson reveals where he got the idea for a cabinet of treacherous numbskulls

Scar from The Lion King facing a saluting hyena
John Shafthauer

Despite stiff competition from May and Cameron, Boris Johnson has formed what may be the worst cabinet of all time:

 

Start your day with The Canary News Digest

Fresh and fearless; get excellent independent journalism from The Canary, delivered straight to your inbox every morning.




But where did Johnson get the idea for this coalition of treacherous morons? Surprisingly, the answer is Walt Disney.

The Lion Thing

Johnson has blatantly ripped off The Lion King (which is itself very possibly ripped off Japan’s Kimba the White Lion). When asked why he’s opting to mimic the political strategizing of an evil cartoon lion, Johnson said:

After this Scar fellow took power, he just kind of lounged around while the lady lions and hyenas did all the work. I really quite fancied that.

It was pointed out that while Scar did this, the entire Pride Land fell into something of a post-apocalyptic nightmare. Johnson continued:

Oh did it? I didn’t really notice. I just saw that everyone brought fresh meat to the wily Scar while he did naff all. Did you know Scar went to Oxford? We goaded the same homeless man with a burning £50 note two years apart.

Hyena pride

Moving past that, Johnson was questioned as to whether he cared that the hyenas ultimately ended up eating Scar alive – ripping him to pieces with their sharp teeth.

“Oh did they?” a yawning Johnson asked. “I’m afraid I’d dozed off by that point. It’s all this meat I’m gorging myself on – it really is making me rather… sleepy…”

As the PM fell asleep, Dominic Raab and Priti Patel entered the room. They each had an arm of the community nurse they’d just taken down in their mouth. Despite having recently eaten, both still looked hungry.

It seems like Johnson has gone from being the hyena in a pack of scabby lions to a scabby lion with a pack of scabbier hyenas. We’ll see how that works out for him.

Featured image via YouTube – Disney

Get involved

Since you're here ...

We know you don't need a lecture. You wouldn't be here if you didn't care.
Now, more than ever, we need your help to challenge the rightwing press and hold power to account. Please help us survive and thrive.

The Canary Support