Theresa May promised the UK that on 8 June she would bring strength and stability.
It’s 9 June today.
And the country is getting a taste of what she promised:
Strong and err…
Following the successful general election that May called for some reason, she gave a rousing speech – the mighty leader telling her adoring fans:
So… well the thing is… err… is it hot in here or is it just me?
May then announced that she was forming a coalition government with the DUP. A political party which is famous for its… strong views. The DUP issued the following statement in response:
Global warming is a gay conspiracy to make eejits believe in dinosaurs.
Despite May having provided us with such strong stability, there are rumours that Boris Johnson is trying to oust her:
Which is perhaps unsurprising, as Johnson’s campaign was, if anything, even stronger than May’s:
Onwards and upwards!
Regardless of which colossal Tory powerhouse takes us forward, it’s clear that after this election, the EU will be forced to give us a good deal. If only to get away from us. Much like when a person gets out of a fight by pretending to be ‘loco’ and beating themselves up.
Although so far, our European neighbours have not commented on the election:
Almost as if there’s no way of doing so without saying ‘WTF’, ‘LOL’, or ‘why do you keep doing this to yourself?’
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Featured image via YouTube