Liar promises to end austerity again but this time with dancing

Theresa May and the government before her have previously said austerity is ending. This was reported at the time, and although the media knows the same old lie is repackaged every year, they couldn’t help but become distracted, because LOOK, SHE DID A LITTLE FUCKING DANCE!

https://twitter.com/hourlyterrier/status/1047447590046973952

ABBA dabba F.U.

May came out jiving to Dancing Queen by ABBA. She then proceeded to:

• Talk nonsense.
• Remix Labour’s slogans.
• Offer nothing new.
• Claim austerity has worked despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
• Promise to end austerity (again (A-FUCKING-GAIN!))

This left newspaper editors with a dilemma:

https://twitter.com/hourlyterrier/status/1047787501140807681

Except – ha ha – no. Obviously there was no dilemma, no danger of it being framed as:

WOMAN AND PARTY WHO LIED TO US ABOUT ENDING THE MISERY THEY’RE INFLICTING MAKE SAME CLAIM AS LAST YEAR (AND THE YEAR BEFORE THAT (AND THE YEAR BEFORE THAT!))

No. How could that be the angle? SHE DID A LITTLE FUCKING DANCE.

It isn’t the media’s job to question those in power or highlight past wrongs. It’s the media’s job to point out SHE DANCED ONTO THE STAGE – LOOK AT HER FUCKING GO – DON’T LOOK AT THE AUSTERITY – LOOK AT THE MOVES – THIS IS STRICTLY COME CHANCING AND THEN SOME!

Balance

In the interest of balance, we should point out that Theresa May did do a little dance. As such, and with only 16 hours to prepare, it’s understandable that editors didn’t have time to put together better front pages with CRITICAL FUCKING ANALYSIS.

478 days apart. But the same headline. You can call this many things but journalism it is most definitely not. pic.twitter.com/wFyETWDCow

— Tory Fibs (@ToryFibs) October 3, 2018

Get Involved!

– For more satirical news, you can also follow Off The Perch on Facebook and Twitter.

– Join The Canary, so we can keep holding the powerful to account.

Featured image via John Shafthauer [IMAGE WAS ALTERED]