Liar promises to end austerity again but this time with dancing

The front pages for Thursday 5 October - all showing May dancing & pointing out her promise to allegedly end austerity
Support us and go ad-free

Theresa May and the government before her have previously said austerity is ending. This was reported at the time, and although the media knows the same old lie is repackaged every year, they couldn’t help but become distracted, because LOOK, SHE DID A LITTLE FUCKING DANCE!

https://twitter.com/hourlyterrier/status/1047447590046973952

ABBA dabba F.U.

May came out jiving to Dancing Queen by ABBA. She then proceeded to:

  • Talk nonsense.
  • Remix Labour’s slogans.
  • Offer nothing new.
  • Claim austerity has worked despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
  • Promise to end austerity (again (A-FUCKING-GAIN!))

This left newspaper editors with a dilemma:

https://twitter.com/hourlyterrier/status/1047787501140807681

Except – ha ha – no. Obviously there was no dilemma, no danger of it being framed as:

WOMAN AND PARTY WHO LIED TO US ABOUT ENDING THE MISERY THEY’RE INFLICTING MAKE SAME CLAIM AS LAST YEAR (AND THE YEAR BEFORE THAT (AND THE YEAR BEFORE THAT!))

Read on...

Support us and go ad-free

No. How could that be the angle? SHE DID A LITTLE FUCKING DANCE.

It isn’t the media’s job to question those in power or highlight past wrongs. It’s the media’s job to point out SHE DANCED ONTO THE STAGE – LOOK AT HER FUCKING GO – DON’T LOOK AT THE AUSTERITY – LOOK AT THE MOVES – THIS IS STRICTLY COME CHANCING AND THEN SOME!

Balance

In the interest of balance, we should point out that Theresa May did do a little dance. As such, and with only 16 hours to prepare, it’s understandable that editors didn’t have time to put together better front pages with CRITICAL FUCKING ANALYSIS.

Get Involved!

– For more satirical news, you can also follow Off The Perch on Facebook and Twitter.

– Join The Canary, so we can keep holding the powerful to account.

Featured image via John Shafthauer [IMAGE WAS ALTERED]

Support us and go ad-free

Do your bit for independent journalism

Did you know that less than 1.5% of our readers contribute financially to The Canary? Imagine what we could do if just a few more people joined our movement to achieve a shared vision of a free and fair society where we nurture people and planet.

We need you to help out, if you can.

When you give a monthly amount to fund our work, you are supporting truly independent journalism. We hold power to account and have weathered many attempts to shut us down and silence the counterpoint to the mainstream.

You can count on us for rigorous journalism and fearless opposition to an increasingly fascist government and right wing mainstream media.

In return you get:

  • Advert free reading experience
  • Behind the scenes monthly e-newsletter
  • 20% discount from our shop

 

The Canary Fund us

Comments are closed