Tepid politician serves tea to mugs

Boris Johnson recently referred to Muslim women in niqabs as ‘bank robbers’. As it’s the summer break, this story could roll on for weeks. This would probably be appropriate, if the press was doing a good job holding him to account.

Instead, we’re getting this:

"I have nothing to say about this matter except to offer you some tea…" @BorisJohnson greets the media armed with a tray of mugs amid burka row pic.twitter.com/5wknsuUBTH

— ITV News (@itvnews) August 12, 2018

Drink up

A smirking Johnson approached the waiting journalists with a tea tray. This should have reminded them of the famous saying: ‘Beware of a racist bearing hot drinks’.

“Shut up and drink my tea,” a smiling Johnson told them.

The journalists were unsure at first. Presumably, they were worried that laughing along with the man who’s “leveraging hatred and racism” might make them look complicit.

“Put it in your mouths,” Johnson laughed. “Do it. Do it for BoJo.”

Laughing along with the allegedly charming character, the journalists did as they were told.

“YES!” Steve Bannon shouted from a window of the house, “YOU DRANK THE TEA, AND NOW WE OWN YOU, YOU COMMUNIST LIMEY BITCHES!”

The journalists were going to ask Johnson why he was working for Bannon – one of the architects of President Trump’s ‘Muslim ban’.

“Shut up and eat this Jaffa cake,” Johnson purred, as he mushed it into their hungry mouths.

Although to be fair, not everyone accepted the confectionaries:

https://twitter.com/OliverMilne/status/1028744854988353537

Stirrer

After drinking the tea, some of the journalists worried that Johnson may have stirred the drinks with his nob. The question isn’t if he’s childish enough to have done such a thing; the question is would it be any more humiliating for the journalists if he had?

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Featured image via screengrab [IMAGE WAS ALTERED]