Angry middle-aged men boycott Lush following spy-cops campaign

For years, the kingdom of Great Britain has been spying on its own citizens. Primarily as said citizens do bestial things like fighting against climate change or animal cruelty.

The soap company Lush tried to raise awareness of this issue. In the process, though, the chain alienated its most loyal demographic of shoppers: angry middle-aged men.

Bubbles

We spoke to some of the raging-dads who will be boycotting Lush.

Frank Franks

“I was popping down to Lush to buy myself a nice bath bomb when I saw the cop protest in the window. I couldn’t believe it. How am I supposed to enjoy the Mail in the bath now I know Lush are a bunch of lefty activists?”

Tobias Youngington

“They said the campaign was to raise awareness of dubious undercover police. Well, that’s backfired, hasn’t it? Or at least that’s what the tabloid front-pages I read this morning said, anyway.”

Keith Sandwich

“EVER SINCE THEY JAILED TOMMY ROBINSON I CAN’T REMEMBER IF WE LIKE THE POLICE OR NOT, BUT IF SOME PC SOAP-MONGER SAID IT, I’M AGAINST IT!”

Tabloid poutrage

The tabloids’ defence of the police is largely situational. When it comes to proportioning blame for rising crime, they usually side with the government. When it comes to elements of the force behaving criminally, they go after whoever pointed out the criminality.

Almost as if they’re magnetically attracted to badness.

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Featured image via pxhere