Army on standby to deliver Brexiteer propaganda post-Brexit

Plans have been drawn up for the possibility of a no-deal Brexit. This could see the army delivering vital British necessities – like food, fuel, medicine, and tweets about what a nob Piers Morgan is.

Brexiteers have petitioned to add something else to this list – namely, propaganda that insists the Brex-apocalypse is actually quite good.

Keep calm and Brexit on

Prominent Brexiteers have insisted that the following messages should be delivered with people’s rations:

Project Fear said we’d be eating pig anuses post-Brexit. The reality is they’re cow. Brexit wins again!
You don’t need petrol to get to work when the factory you worked at moved to Poland, am I right?
Medicine is for snowflakes. In the old days, they’d saw your leg off and all you had to take your mind off it was a slice of tangerine. Look forward to all that and more with the brand new Privatised Health Service!
Most of the food we can’t get anymore was foreign anyway. You know who else was foreign? Hitler.
We survived WWII, so we can get through this. Many people didn’t survive WWII, obviously, but the important people did. It will be the same with Brexit. Anyway – enjoy your cow anuses!